ku kan..

ku tak kan mau kita jadi garis di jalan
garis yang selalu bersama
tapi tak kunjung temu

ku tak kan jua mau kita jadi bintang
yang seolah riuh saling bersapa
namun sesungguhnya terpisah jarak jutaan tahun cahaya *

ku mau kita jadi melodi
saling berganti seakan tak terganti
apalagi lantunan irama dari celotehanmu yang lugu

ku mau kita jadi tawa
tawa gelagak sepanjang malam sejuta arti hanya milik kita


ku mau
ku mau kita
ku mau kita jadi

tapi sayang
bukan ku mau yang jadi




* dikutip dari Negeri Para Peri oleh Avianti Armand

1 March 2011

dying..

you!
yes sir you are!
you're the one that looking at your back!
you are under impeachment for making me crying without any logical reason!
you have to responsible of what you did years ago..
you have to..

surely, you really have to..


you have to..



you have to..

 26 February 2011

the song..

that song does always remind me to him

to him who never said that he was in love with me
to him who just grabbed my hand and took me fly away
to him who be glad when i had story to tell
to him who always smiled at me even when i had nothing to say

to him who owned my eyes for always looking at him
to him who remember me the most of his embrace
to him who was the answer of my yearning
to him who knew for sure that i loved him.. and yes, i still do..


but now,
a song is just a song..
nothing to be regretted
nothing to be scared of

a friend teaches me the better way to let it go..
let it fly as the wind goes by
and not disappear in the game of time
hopefully he could be the best friend of mine..

2 October 2010

on and on

can i pause the time that flown
can i say NO to the fact that grown

for the wind has blown
and forever gone..



i'll be missing you guys

freedom lovers!!
fo'eva!!

5 August 2010

let it out

there is something inside
that really wanna go out
let me scream for a while
and the pain will be fade

please,
help me
i don't know what it is
i don't even know who i'm missing

just help me
pull out this feeling

oh please
CALM ME DOWN!

23 July 2010

kairos

many times we past through together
both good and bad ones
we've known each other in and out
nothing best than this amazing acquaintanceship


i know i can't thank you enough,
but that's all i can do.


thanks for being friends that always cheer up my days
thanks for being family when i have no word to say
thanks for being sister when i'm down and can not fly
thanks for being brother to wipe my tears and make me smile


thanks for telling me what is wrong and what is right
thanks for made me see the line between black and white
thanks for being the one who gives me a hand
thanks for being the one that helps me to understand



you all are the ones that i love
my life was just incomplete without you..

thank you Molly
thank you Catrine
thank you Feli
thank you Sylvia
thank you vet (a.k.a Novita)
thank you Nath
thank you Doddy
thank you Vivi
thank you Ipin (a.k.a Wilson)
thank you Robin
thank you Sally
thank you Kevin
thank you Feb
thank you Ari
thank you Parlin


thank YOU guys

best conversation class ever!!

 you guys are my sweet kairos in my chronos!

17 July 2010

sick.

he came to my dream
as if he knew i miss him

those shiny tidy hair
with a gentle smiling face
postured in a masculine body
and opened up helpful hands


i couldn't even imagine
he has left..
left his home
left his friends
left his school
and yeah..
left my heart



i'm desperate.

sure.

i'm sick.

30 June 2010

what we call teamwork..

for the moment we had..
for the story we shared..
for the tears fell down..
for the teamwork has grown..
for the loyalty so deep..
for the faith we keep..
for having each others backs..
for the time we will never regret..
thank you guys

4 June 2010

spontaneous in one day morning

don't you ever miss me?

I miss you so much
more than ever
I almost cried in my bed
dreaming of you

you steer my life to another world
somewhere I don't even know
yet I feel safe
just because you are holding my hand

but now,
where are you?
I can see me alone
sitting here
and waiting for you

but yes,
always wait for you..

18 April 2010

is it ok?

is it ok to be alone?
is it matter, anyway?

i don't mind..
it's very ok for me to be alone..
eating alone..
sitting alone..
sleeping alone..
doing tasks alone..
watching alone..
reading alone..
I'm used to doing everything alone.


but it's written in Genesis 2:18,
And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

that's why i'm distracted..
ffiuhh..

so,
is it ok to be alone?
is it matter, anyway?


it is PERFECTLY A MATTER now.

9 April 2010

hidup seperti sebuah buku

untuk kesekian kali nya saya mendengar orang berbicara :
"hidup ini memang seperti sebuah roda yang terus berputar..
kadang di atas.. kadang di bawah.."

honestly,
saya pernah menyetujui pernyataan tersebut.
bahkan ketika saya berada dalam keadaan sesadar-sadarnya.

namun, yang tidak saya pikirkan adalah: "apa benar seperti itu?"

setidaknya, sekitar 10 menit yang lalu ada angin berhembus melewati kepala saya dan berkata :
"tidak..
tidak seperti itu..
hidup itu seperti sebuah buku..

buku yang memiliki titik awal dan titik akhir..
buku yang memiliki alur bergerak lurus..
bukan berputar..

ia maju..
dan maju sampai akhir..

memang ada kala nya kita berada di atas
dan ada kala kita berada di bawah..
namun buku juga mencatat
saat seharusnya kita di bawah, dan kita tidak mau turun dari atas..
dan saat seharusnya kita di atas dan kita tidak mau beranjak dari bawah..

segala yang kita lewati tidak dapat diulang..
baik itu baik maupun buruk..
kita tidak hidup dalam suatu lingkaran,
yang kehidupan nya dapat kita ulangi lagi..

kita memang dapat membuka lembaran yang lalu dari buku tersebut..
namun kita tidak dapat menikmati kembali betapa excited-nya ketika pertama kali membaca buku tsb..
yang bisa kita lakukan hanyalah mengingat moment yang terjadi dalam buku tsb..

karena,
sayangnya waktu tak dapat diulang kembali..
dan untungnya waktu tak dapat diulang kembali..

karena hidup adalah seperti sebuah buku.."

25 September 2009

Surely He lives

I couldnt differ it was a bad or nice dream..

I dreamt about 1 verse in Holy Bible..
I dont know exactly what it says..
I just conscious that the verse is not only for the person i talked to in my dream, but also for me..

But the point i get:
it is the warning given that i pray evryday..


Aftr sharing it,
i found 1 essential different btween bfore n after i know Him..

Previously,
i was actively enough in several religious events..
i did practice what i learned..
But i got nothing change..
There is no 'knocking' in my life..

It's totally diffrent with my condition now..

i pray, i get the warning..
N that's the answer of my wrestle..
If there is an answer,
there is SOMEONE who gives..
And,
it makes me more believe,
surely HE LIVES.

 23 June 2009

Terima kasih..

Dear God,
siapakah Engkau hingga Kau mau turun dr tempat-Mu yg maha tinggi?

Siapakah kami hingga kami layak brpengharapan,
bahkan mnrima keselamatan?


Tidak sakit hatikah Engkau melihat kami?
Kami yg dicipta-Mu sedemikian rupa,
kami yg dikasihi di dlm-Mu,
namun apa yg kami lakukan..
Brdosa, brkhianat pada-Mu!
Ingin bebas dr pd-Mu,
namun senang terikat pada setan!
Sungguh gembira dlm pkerjaan iblis,
namun brteriak dlm naungan lembut tangan-Mu!

Tuhan,
tdk bencikah Engkau pd kami?
Pd sgala apa yg kami prbuat?


Bapa,
kami ingin kembali pada-Mu..
Kami rindu..
Sungguh rindu..


Terima kasih Bapa..
Dlm perjalanan ku menemukan anugrah..
Tiada lg yg perlu ku khawatirkan..


Tangan-Mu sejak awal telah memegangku..
Bapa..
Terima kasih..

22 May 2009

Pilot

Hi!
Well, it is really my first blog. So,I bet this is my worst writing ever.
I found that it was really hard to start something new, such as this blog. However, I was really thankful to the role teacher, Mr. (late) Pramoedya Ananta Toer, to give me some encouragement to work for eternity. Then to my senior, Mr. Harry Febrian, to help me realizing it. Also my kind-bad ass-freaky friend, Ms. Anastasia Hamid, to write something unwritten (loh?). And last but not least, to all my friends and acquaintances who gave such wonderful inspirations.

Well, for the first step, I'm just gonna transfer all my works in my Facebook notes to this blog. Then for further period, I will take this blog as my priority to produce my works.

I do hope all of you are willing to give any comments or suggestions to mine in every single sort of view.

So, have a look, guys!